Stressed about Resting?

The topic of workplace related stress has been discussed in the media quite extensively recently. It all started with the World Health Organization (WHO) mistakenly announcing that it has classified "Burnout" as a medical condition, before reclassifying it as an occupational phenomenon. Closer to home, the Sentosa Development Corporation (SDC) conducted a survey, and the results showed a few sobering realities.

• 52% of respondents felt they were in a daily routine they cannot get out of
• 74% wished they could spend more time with their families and loved ones
• 30% mentioned they do not know how to relax
• 50% responded that they were stressed out by the thought of doing nothing

This commentary by a writer from Mothership.sg also hit me on a personal level, where she mentioned how even as a student we would spend all our holidays trying to do something productive, and in the workplace more often than not we will prioritize our work over our free time and even health.

I fully relate to the author in how she feels about our attitudes towards work and school. In fact, back when I was schooling, during term time more often than not I would spend my time studying. Even when I'm not, I would find some ways to occupy my time, such as taking on external VIA projects, leadership roles, and being part of planning committees. The reason part stemmed from wanting to be more involved in school activities for various reasons (experience, beefing up portfolio, knowing more people, learning skills), but also came a bit from envy and the fear of missing out (FOMO). I saw peers who were doing better than me academically taking on multiple responsibilities but still doing well, and I felt that if they can do it, so can I! As for school holidays, I also tried to occupy myself with activities related to school or (rarely) social life due to the FOMO factor. 

While this did give me a sense of accomplishment and pride when I complete project after project, it did give me a lot of stress throughout the year as I rarely had much "me" time. Furthermore, after one activity was done, I had to worry or focus on another activity, so there was really not much time to rest in between. Even after my final NUSHS exams in 2017, my next few months were spent studying for NUS undergraduate exams, then a grad trip, then applying for university, then 7 weeks of internship, then enlisting in the army. 

Even now in army, while I do serve in a more clerical position, it doesn't reduce the stress as much. Being someone who needs his sleep to perform, after getting home, I'll have my dinner and most likely sleep till the next day, where I wake up to the dread realization of going to work, and the process repeats. But the real interesting part is even during weekends when I'm off work, especially since I cannot do work (work is on an SAF server only accessible in camp on weekdays), I find myself worrying over what may screw up at work the next week, but find myself powerless to remedy the situation. Even now, as I write this post, I am pretty stressed out.

But why are we always so stressed?

It is most likely the ideology that most Singaporeans were brought up with, however flawed it may be, that hard work leads to success. Therefore, once we have a goal in mind, we will spend as much effort and time we have on it, often sacrificing our rest and non-work time. In school, we chase our academic grades or non-academic achievements. At work, we chase that promotion, pay raise, or just that little bit of recognition from our superiors or respect from our colleagues. Even when we don't have a goal in mind, we still spend all our time chasing a non-existent goal, because otherwise we will feel that we are not spending our time meaningfully. 

And that is the issue, because of our mentality, we villify resting and recreation, to the extent that we regard doing anything out of our work as "wasting time". Since when has resting became bad? Why is doing something we genuinely like regarded as a useless activity?

Another reason why we work too hard and play too little is possibly because we are too afraid of what others think of us. We often take on more responsibilities back in school because we want to seem busy yet capable so others can look up to us, or at least for the ultimate goal of universities/employers looking favourably upon our applications. At work, we always want to seem busy so that our bosses and colleagues won't dismiss us as a waste of company resources. To many people, it is always better to be a "tanker" than a "slacker". However, well intentions aside of everybody, perhaps sometimes we Singaporeans think too much about what others think, and perhaps sometimes we think wrongly too. No one will really fault a hardworking person for taking a break, and if they do, that is purely a result of a toxic work/school environment.

Perhaps it is because that we are so used to chasing excellence and perfection, such that it is now a cultural norm. That's why so many people are overworked with little to no rest, and complain about burnout; Anything that improves productivity is at the forefront, everything else is useless. If taken to the extreme, Singapore may end up like Japan, where workers work more than 12 hours a day, and in some cases, work till their deaths.

This is why I am adamant after completing my NS next February, I will want to go on a strict 6 month break without working and minimal studying prep for university. Because I owe it to myself to rest after 14 continuous years of hard work and stress, before continuing on for another 4 years of undergraduate studies and whatever comes afterwards.

Even if our employers and schools give us less workload or more time off to relax, I do think most Singaporeans will end up just find other ways to work or study, since this mentality of working hard is ingrained in us too deeply. At the end of the day, countering burnout is not a policy issue, it is a mindset issue.